Ostomy

Most of you know that I deal with my Crohn’s disease and my ostomy on a daily basis.

I took the day off today to visit the ostomy nurse and check in with how I’m doing. Spending the day at the doctor’s office brings back some weird memories, especially when I’ve been feeling low-energy lately anyway. I go tomorrow for my IV medications and hopefully that will get me back to feeling more normal, but I am reminded lately that my health is a fluid and ever-changing thing that I can’t necessarily count on.

I am lucky and blessed to have this time in my life where I’m experiencing a remission and feeling well and able to participate in real living but sometimes I get scared about the reality of my shaky health future and what I can expect five years from now, or even one year from now. Last year at this time I was going to Mayo Clinic and seeking out new doctors and new medications and praying for something that works and I can’t help but not trust being well.

This letter goes to one of my Crohn’s buddies who understands the uncertainty of life with a chronic disease. She could use your prayers so that she can enjoy a remission as well.

Downton Abbey

Sometimes we long for the simpler times of the past, but this show proves to me that some things today are easier. I love it, I get so sucked into all of the drama that is happening in the characters’ lives and at the same time I am horrified that they spend so much time worrying about things that don’t matter.

A letter to someone who does.

Cray Cray

I don’t think there are very many people in the world that can pull off using abbreviations. Generally they just sound pretty silly unless you are one of the people that just make it WORK. That make it sound like a catch phrase you should be using.

One of those people is Betsy. I like that she uses abbrevs… it adds to her charm.

 

 

Thanksgiving

Our Thanksgiving was small this year and bittersweet. We are finding ourselves facing the holidays with an empty seat this season. It’s hard to try and embrace the people you have around you while respecting the memory of people you have lost.

We were so glad this year to have Tiffany be a part of our Thanksgiving meal as part of our holiday tradition. She is family to us and it would not have been the same without her. I am thankful for her presence and for how she handled the occasional awkwardness of our family navigating this time with grace.

To a friend that is so close to my heart.

Black Friday

I am hiding out for Black Friday in my house with a giant cup of tea, letters, and a Downton Abbey marathon.

Some of my friends are much braver than me and are venturing out into the shopping world today.  Part of me is jealous of that and part of me is thankful to be where I am.

This letter is to Caleigh who traveled north to be with family and also managed to shop today. I don’t know how she possibly has the energy.

Visits

I am thankful this year for Katie who is a good enough friend that I can count down weeks and days until her visit out of happiness. I am thankful that she puts up with my pushiness and over-planning nature and that she is willing to look over all of my faults and is excited to spend time with me as well.

As strange as it is to find my friends getting married, Katie shows me such a good example of what a marriage should look like. She and her husband are so good to each other and for each other and I am so happy that they show that in all they do.

Family

I have been blessed with a spectacular family, but it is also incredibly tiny. Our Thanksgiving meal is down to five family members and any friends we can include.

Some family members that we have been blessed with this year are Tom and Lois, my great uncle and aunt. They have their own Thanksgiving celebration but are present here in conversation and love and send us cards and newspaper clippings letting us know we are on their minds.

It’s a pretty awesome thing to have people in this world who take the time to let you know they are thinking of you.

Hedgehogs

One of my wonderful married friends just got a new little buddy named Nutmeg. He’s super cute.

I wanted to write to Amy and send her some holiday love. This is her first year having Thanksgiving as a married woman and I think that’s awesome. I love her and I am thankful for how I’ve been able to see her grow and change over the years and become the person she is now.

A letter celebrating Amy.

Stars

My kids have been working on keynote presentations all week and learning how to deal with the stress of public speaking.

One girl broke down while practicing and refused to speak and sobbed uncontrollably. Things in life are scary and gut-wrenching.

This letter is to Caleigh who experiences life with kids every day as well as scary life business. She’s a star to me and I like her a lot.

Missing you.

I’ve never been to San Francisco. I rarely stray from the midwest.

Tiffany is on a work trip out there, taking pictures of things I’ve never seen. I’m continually surprised at the breadth of our country. I can’t comprehend how many things are here, and we in turn are such a small part of the rest of the world.

I’m looking at her pictures and feeling nostalgic about places I’ve never been to. I sometimes get an ache in my chest thinking of all of the things in the world I’ll never see. The problem with a life like mine, all planned out and scheduled and busy, is missing this.

I’m ready for days off and snow and Thanksgiving and hearing about travels from friends.